SEX AND MARRIAGE

Sexual relationships were created by God for the benefit, the pleasure and the production of mankind. All of creation, whether plant or animal life has a plan for reproduction. Everything God made had the challenge offered to “Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth.” Everything was intended to produce after its own kind. With humans in particular the man and wife were made by God to have sex as part of a close bond, where the two people engaged in sexual relations would be facing each other. The way God created sex was intended to be a personal, loving relationship between two people showing care and love for each other. Normally, sex in the animal kingdom was done with the male facing the back side of the female. The act was performed because the female was in heat. It was the meeting of a need that would result in reproduction, not a loving relationship between two people who cared deeply for each other.

With the animals, having sex was a physical act which allowed both to fulfill a need but was never meant to either show or even help develop a loving relationship between the two. There is no language among the animals about faithfulness or unfaithfulness. There is no pledge of commitment. There is neither marriage nor divorce. Sex is just something done between the male and female that meets a need. If cattle are in the pen and a bull has sex with one of the cows and goes a few hours later to have sex with another producing pregnancies and new babies for both it doesn’t create any problems in the family and one of the cows isn’t mad because the other one had sex with her bull.

But with mankind it is different now and has been different from the time Adam and Eve were first introduced to each other. There was loyalty and love committed to one another from the beginning. Adam looked at Eve and declared, “This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. She will be called woman for she was taken out of man. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two will become one flesh.” Notice the elements of Adam’s statement from the beginning. He laid out for all to follow what was obvious to him with regard to his love for Eve. Their relationship was to involve leaving parents to start a new home separate from them where you would love and care for each other. This new home and relationship involves loyalty to each other above and beyond your love for parents. This love for each other was to be consummated by sexual relations with each other so that two people become one flesh. It is only in the male and female being joined sexually that the two becoming one can take place. They are made sexually for each other. Their coming together makes the whole and one physically, emotionally, mentally and sexually. The bond of loyalty is intended to go on as long as the two people live. The whole notion of taking this act of love and loyalty to a mate in marriage and instead sharing that bond with numerous people is to desecrate the whole plan. Sex for humans is a purposeful joining of two to become one. For humans to see sex just as a physical act to meet some physical need is to turn the whole matter into an animalistic affair instead of human love between a male and female.

Sex as God planned it brings meaning. It pulls two people of the opposite sex together into a single bond with potential to producing another person or more from that bond. It produces a physical bond that has social, familial and personal meaning to it like no other bond ever had or imagined. When sex is perverted and treated like two dogs or cats that have shared sex as part of a pleasurable afternoon it loses most of its meaning and purpose.

Sex in marriage is a divine plan of action in which we can join with God in producing someone else that shares some parts with both parents yet is a brand new person, unique from with parent and with a soul or spirit that only God can provide. He is the “Father of spirits.” Sexual relations between two people of opposite sex, joined by God to one another in marriage is fulfilling a divine mission or purpose which is to be held in honor by all. In Hebrews 13:4 the write said, “Marriage is honorable in all and the marriage bed is undefiled. But the sexually immoral and the adulterers God will judge.” What does it mean that the marriage bed is undefiled? It is that the marriage bed is planned and pleasing to God and every means by which a couple who are married enjoy sexual relations together is to be honored and honorable by all. But sex outside that marriage relationship, whether done as sexual immorality or as being unfaithful to the marriage vows we share with each other in the marriage bed, is something God will judge. People may hide their actions from all manner of people so that they appear to be faithful and true all the time to each other while really being involved in immoral behavior, may fool each other or family and friends, but none can fool God. He sees and knows all and he will judge all.

Sex and marriage are naturally bound up in each other. No wonder Paul wrote, “To avoid sexual immorality, let every man have is own wife and every woman her own husband.” It is a plan worth honoring and keeping.

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About leoninlittlerock

Preaching minister for Central church of Christ in Little Rock. Author of over 20 books including: When a Loved one Dies, Spiritual Development, Skid Marks on the Family Drive, Challenges in the church, To Know Christ and A Drink of Living Water.
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